How to Get Your Spouse Excited About You Seeing Sex Workers
Welcome back. This is our fourth installment in this series.
You can check out Part 1 here.
You can check out Part 2 here.
And you can check out Part 3 here.
Phew! All caught up! Let’s get you into that strip club!
So your spouse is finally game for you going to a strip club. There’s two ways that this can play out: she comes with you; or you go by yourself. Each way can be fun but also has its potential pitfalls.
Let’s start off with the more likely of the two scenarios – your significant other comes with you. You can have a lot of fun. She can have a lot of fun. You can both have a lot of fun. Or it can turn to shit real fast!
To prevent said shit, the two of you should have a thorough conversation before you go. This conversation is where you need to remember to not push her to do stuff or push her to let you do stuff. If she’s uncomfortable with things and you push, it won’t be fun for her anymore and she could call the whole thing off. Or worse, she could agree to something she doesn’t want and then regret it afterwards – that’s where you get the big problems!
You should have a fun but serious talk before you go. Start off by asking her what she might be nervous about. Common concerns she may have include being the only female customer there, or that you’ll just stare at the strippers and ignore her, or that you’ll compare her to them. Alleviate her concerns, tell her she’s incredible and make it so that the second she feels uncomfortable, you leave. Also, if she has a concern that you’ll ignore her, make a note to yourself not to do that when you get there.
You should also discuss what you can and cannot do when you’re there. Is she ok with you getting a lap dance? Does she want to join you for a dance? Can you touch? Or should you just look at the stage.
Two important things to keep in mind:
- Try not to drink a lot. Maybe one or two drinks max. Once you start to feel a little more courageous, you might make decisions that you can’t undo and really regret later. Her seeing you licking a stripper’s nipples may seem fun at the time but may haunt her later when you’re back in your regular day to day life.
- On your first couple of times, maybe just try to get the lay of the land. See how she feels in the situation before you start asking if you can get lap dances. Let her ease into it slowly so she’s good with more down the road.
What you don’t want to have occur is that something she didn’t realize would bother her does end up bothering her. Then the idea of you going to the strip club isn’t something she’s excited about … But rather it’s something that causes her hurt.
When you’re there. Pay attention to your spouse. Check to make sure she’s comfortable. Ask her. Try not to crane your neck to stare at the hot red head with the incredible ass who just walked by. Read your spouse’s body language. Put your hand on hers if she seems uncomfortable. And if she doesn’t want to be there, leave. And don’t make her feel bad about it.
And no matter how the first time there goes, when you get home, YOU MAKE IT WORTH HER WHILE! I’m talking, eating her out for an hour, give it to her in multiple positions and do it with enthusiasm … more than once … Which should come naturally because … Hell, you were just at a strip club with a ton of beautiful naked women and your wife or girlfriend was there with you! How hot is that???
Next time you go, take the exact same approach. Her comfort is utmost. Make her feel that it’s a place that isn’t a threat to her. Once she feels comfortable, she associates your stimulation with her stimulation, the instinct of jealousy turns to compersion! She’ll start to like you seeing other women in a sexual light because she knows you’re going to come back home to her with a big old hard-on in your pants. And you’re gonna’ fuck her with it!
Now, the other way you could end up going to a strip club would be by yourself with her at home. This could happen if she doesn’t feel comfortable going there with you and sends you alone or if you’ve gone a number of times with her and now she feels comfortable sending you without her. Either way, same strategy.
Before you go, have a conversation between the two of you. Discuss what she’s comfortable with and what she’s not. Don’t push the boundaries. She has to feel that she can trust you.
And when you’re there, keep your word to her. Don’t just tell her what she wants to hear with the intent to fuck all the rules and do whatever you want. Women can smell bullshit and you’ll eventually get caught. And then it’s all over – no more watching porn together, no more strip clubs, no chance of having sex with a sex worker … And possibly no more relationship!
Always remember, having sexual relations with sex workers, even just a lap dance, is not considered cheating if you are following the rules set out in your relationship. It IS considered cheating when you agree on one thing but you do something else.
Now, while you’re gone, what the heck should your wife or girlfriend do? Rather than sit and worry about what you’re up to, she can have a couple of glasses of wine and watch a little porn about lap dances turning into blowjobs turning into full sex. Hot!
You guys can even sext each other while you’re there. She can ask about what you see, if there’s anyone you like, what you’re going to do when you get home. This way she feels like she’s included in the excitement of you being there – like she’s part of it but from the comfort of your bed! (Just keep your phone pointed to the ground while you’re texting. The last thing you want is the huge bouncer coming over accusing you of taking pictures of the strippers.)
Now, when you get home, avoid raving about how awesome it was. She may not want to hear about it all at once. Ask her while you’re getting into things if she’d like to hear about it. Let her decide how much she wants to know. She can ask about whatever she feels comfortable with. Gauge her questions and match the enthusiasm in your answers to her level of enthusiasm.
And if she seems as if she’s like she’s starting to feel jealous, remind her that the women there are just porn that can see you as far as you’re concerned.
And no matter what, make sure you make the sex incredible for her that night. And maybe even wake her up the next morning and go again! She’ll remember that the next time you discuss going out.
And talking about going out the next time, don’t ask to go the next weekend. But still have fun with her. You don’t want her to feel like the strip club is the end-all be-all for you. Maybe every couple of months you guys can discuss it and make it like a treat for you.
But when you’re having sex the other times, you can still occasionally put on the stripper porn. And you can talk about what you’ll do the next time you go. Maybe you get a lapdance, maybe you get a lapdance together.
But remember, if you guys do decide to send you for a lapdance, set the ground rules before you go: how many songs, what can you touch and anything else that’s important to her. And when you go, follow the rules you discussed! And when you get back, let her ask about for the details at her own speed.
Each time you go, you can discuss what she’s comfortable with you doing during your lapdance… Caressing, licking, sucking. What does she get off on you doing next?
And, by the way, if you’ve made it this far, congrats because you’re well into compersion territory. But, again, be cautious because jealousy can come rushing back at any moment and ruin everything.
And sometimes it will … And sometimes you won’t even know why.
Next time we’ll talk about what to do if you find yourself in a situation where you’ve crossed a line (eventhough she said it was ok) and now she’s upset by it. We’ll also talk about how to take it to the next level – massage parlours … And if you’re good, we’ll even see about escorts.
Until next time,
–D @Workinggirlssix https://twitter.com/Workinggirlssix