Running my Twitter fan page, Working Girls in the SiXXX (@Workinggirlssix) I get to interact with a wide variety of sex workers from across the country. They’re awesome!
And from the beginning, there have been a few things that keep coming up with the ladies as common pet peeves in the industry.
Now, because I know most of you guys aren’t looking to deliberately get under the skin of these women, I’m going to do you a solid and let you know about a few of the common blunders that guys do that go over with the ladies about as well as a fart in church.
Let’s take a few minutes, review some of these frowned upon actions and compare them to some of their “real life” equivalents.
UnCool Communication:
Sometimes a guy has rubbed a sex worker the wrong way even before he meets her. Just by trying to set up an appointment, he makes himself into a pain in her perfectly round ass.
So many sex worker cannot stand when guys waste their time while trying to book a session. Sending a text or DM that just says “hi” is just plain nonsense. Picture going into Walmart and standing in front of the customer service desk and saying “hi” and nothing else.
That’s cute if you have a severe learning disability … But not for a fully functioning grown man. Ask yourself, does anyone at your work send you an email that just says “hi” and expect you to go digging into it to find out what they want?
Also messages that ask for unsafe services … You know the ones that always start with the two letters synonymous with STI’s – BB … standing for bare back … as in without a condom. Most self-respecting sex workers gag a bit when they see those letters show up in a communication. What it tells them is that you don’t practice safe sex, you have sex with other sex workers who don’t practice safe sex and you are quite possibly riddled with every unpleasant STI there is.
And you’re essentially asking the provider if you could pass those STI’s on to her … possibly even in her mouth? You charmer!!!
Another frustration is when a guy isn’t going to get what he wants from her – she doesn’t offer the service he’s looking for, she doesn’t offer fifteen minutes sessions, she isn’t available to fit his schedule etc,. And then he proceeds to become self-righteous because he wasn’t even interested in her anyways because of how ugly she is and he can get better tail from other girls for half the price! Lovely.
If the Keg is fully booked when you go to make a reservation, you don’t tell the hostess their food is shit and you didn’t want to eat there anyways. When something isn’t available on the menu, you don’t tell the waiter about all the other restaraunts where it is available. Think about how stupid it is to start insulting the manager’s appearance because they don’t have lobster on the menu that night. Why make horrible comments to a sex worker in an attempt to make her feel bad when you wouldn’t do that anywhere else?
Also, when you send a message to her, don’t expect an answer right away. She could be with a client, she could be in the shower, she could be out with friends or family, she could be sleeping. If she doesn’t respond in a few minutes, don’t follow up with “hello???” messages or “guess you weren’t really interested in my money” or anything else insulting. Why would she want to have a session with someone who’s acting like a possessive boyfriend? (FYI – every girl hates those … a lot!)
Another communication faux pas is thinking that the women you see advertising online need rescuing. Or need a boyfriend. They’re posting pics of themselves looking sexy because they want to attract guys’ attention … to make money. Not so that you’ll let them know that you find them attractive and would like them to be your girlfriend.
Unless you have a lot of money to make that worth their while, they’re not looking for a relationship with someone they’ve never met. These women are not damsels in distress. If you’re looking for a girlfriend, there are plenty of online dating sites you can visit instead.
UnCool Pre-Date Behaviour:
Don’t cancel at the last minute …or even worse – just not show up. She could have had someone else lined up. You’ve now cost her money. Not cool to do to another person!
Don’t show up late. It could throw her whole schedule off if you expect your full appointment still.
Don’t show up early. Imagine during your session, her next client shows up early and keeps calling and calling while she’s with you. Bet you wouldn’t like it. Also, she needs time to prep. She doesn’t need someone breathing down her neck as she scrambles to get ready for you. Plus she needs a little down time between clients … Let her have that.
UnCool In-Session Behaviour:
Don’t brag. Not about how rich you are. Not about what car you drive. Not about how good looking you are. Not about how much you work out. Not about how big your cock is. Bragging is bragging and nobody likes when you do it. Nobody. And you won’t get any extra special treatment because of it. Generosity (of any sort) is appreciated far more than anything else you can try to impress her with.
Don’t try to talk her down in price. If you’re someone who goes through life haggling with people, understand that everyone you do that with friggin’ hates you for it. Providers are no different. Do you really want to start such an intimate session making her quietly despise you? How’s your session going to go then? Always remember – she sets her prices according to what she feels her service is worth not according to what you can afford.
Another pet peeve is guys who don’t respect boundaries. If she tells you she doesn’t do something, don’t keep pushing for it. That’s what five year olds do when their mom won’t give them a cookie. Do you want her feeling like she has to treat you like she’s your mom? The combination of moms and sex work just feels gross, if you ask me. If she says no, it’s no. Adults that sex workers enjoy being around respect that.
Also, for Christ’s sake, if she says she doesn’t do something, don’t just fucking do it! That’s assault! It’s criminal! And it’s disgusting!
And finally, the most common thing I hear the ladies complain about is when you’re dirty. And by dirty, I don’t mean bad-but-sexy. I mean there’s a stink about you. Think about what these ladies do over the course of a session – where their faces and mouths end up. Plus, parts of you actually go INSIDE of them!!! If those intimate parts of you are not clean … Well, just think about how much you’d enjoy licking them right after you’ve mowed the lawn on a hot day…
Or having them stuck inside you after you haven’t showered in three says!!! Just wash thoroughly so there is zero odour … Or only the smell of body wash. Nice and clean!
UnCool After-Session Behaviour:
At the end of a session, don’t linger. After an incredible session, you may not want it to end … But, she probably does. She needs to clean up and have some down time for herself before her next client comes. If you’ve ever worked in a grocery store, you’re probably familiar with the people who run into the store two minutes before it closes. They shop around like it’s open for another hour. All the while, the employees have to wait around for them to finish their shopping before said employees can go home for the night. Don’t be one of those clients where all she wants for you to do is leave.
The final shitty thing a guy can do after a session is over is write an unfair review online. If she wasn’t as enthusiastic as you would have liked, there’s a good chance it was because of you – not her! If she didn’t do every high risk service that you would have liked, again, that’s you – not her. It’s certainly not fair to write an inaccurate review about her.
Or maybe it was her and she’s just having a bad day – who hasn’t had one of those? But to write a bad review, it isn’t like writing a bad review about Tim Horton’s when your coffee is too hot. That doesn’t really have much of an impact on Tim Horton’s.
When you write a bad review about a provider, it can impact her income potential in a significant way. Imagine if you had one bad day at work and because of it you take a massive pay cut. Why would you want to screw someone over like that?
In the end, all I’m suggesting is to put yourself in their shoes. Do unto others…
Think of this – every time two guys see a drop dead gorgeous girl walk by, one will always say to the other “what I wouldn’t do for a night with her!”
But you gotta’ ask, would it include sending her a wimpy text that says “hi” followed by asking straight out of the gate if you can fuck her without a condom, then become incredibly belligerent to her if she doesn’t immediately succumb to your charming offer of unprotected filacio, or become extremely overbearing if she doesn’t respond to your text within two minutes, tell her that you love her without ever having spoken to her before, brag to her about how big your dick is, tell her how much cheaper it is to have sex with other girls who are way hotter than her anyways, show up late to meet her, push her to do sexual activities she doesn’t want to do, then try to do it anyways, all the while smelling like the dumpster behind a fish market in August, then hang around her place long after you were expected to leave, and finally talk shit about your time together later online. Is that what you would do to be with a girl as hot as that?
Sounds ludicrous, doesn’t it? And yet soooo many providers complain about these same behaviours time and again.
Guys, these women go out of their way to create a session for us that is phenomenal. The service they provide is probably more enjoyable than any other service you receive from any other service person. The least we as guys can do is offer up a bit of consideration and respect in return. It’s not much to do. Try it and see how much better your sessions are.
Until next time.
–D at @Workinggirlssix